Stress Effects on My Eating Disorder

I have not blogged in quit sometime due to stress and just not knowing what to do with all the chaos going on in and around me.   This week after a very important discussion, I stopped to assessed what was going on and took some time to figure out how to get myself back in the right place to focus on me.  Thanks to a very special person that is always able to get me back in the right frame of mind.  I never wonder to far off the path. 

As I started to review what was said to me in this discussion, it occurred to me that this person highlighted one very important key to figuring me out.  That is my very distinct patterns that I get in.   When I get stressed or wound up about stuff, I immediately fall back on what I know to cope and that is I let myself get so wound up I don't know what to do with myself.  

I read a very important book a month ago called "Life without Ed".  The book is a remarkable read.  I found it to be so helpful.  It helps you to identify all those things or personalities that tell you bad things.  I say I have to people that talk to me, no I don't hear voices, I have personality traits that live inside of me.  One is what the book calls my abusive boyfriend Ed, he tells me I'm never good enough.  The other one in the book and I love what they call her, that is Little Miss Perfect.  She has a very loud voice in my life.  I had learned to control her a bit in program and to tell myself it was OK not to be perfect.  Let's face it, no one is perfect and everyone fails.  It is how you deal with the failure or what you view as failure that makes a difference.  Mine is more about what I view as failure or not meeting others expectations.

So my homework assignment for the weekend will be to re-evaluate how I have coped most recently with all the To Do's in my work and personal life and figure out what the right balance should have been and where I should have asked others for help.  

I will close out with my favorite thing to do in my blogs and that is a quote.  Today, I found inspiration in Debra Messing's Quote about passion and perfection, this may just be the clue I needed. 

"When you're passionate about something, you want it to be all it can be. But in the endgame of life, I fundamentally believe the key to happiness is letting go of that idea of perfection."